Back to blog part 2 - what I did on my summer vacation

I don't think that I have ever had two weeks of vacation at the same time since I started working.  However, that's exactly what happened this year.  And since I had two weeks I felt like I really ought to be doing something with it.

My dad came to Canada from Holland when he was five years old, entering through Pier 21 in Halifax.  Pier 21 is now a museum, documenting the stories it saw during it's years of service.  My dad (and mom) have been there a couple of times, but I never had, and in an effort to appreciate my heritage, we made plans for an east coast vacation that included Pier 21.  I felt fairly strongly that if I was going to see Pier 21, it really should be with my dad.

J. Dawson grave marker

So, we drove east as far as Halifax and started the actual vacation (though not the travel) there.  Pier 21 was first, then the Halifax boardwalk and the Maritime Museum of the Atlantic where they had a Titanic exhibit.   Then we went to one of the cemataries where they buried most of the Titanic victims.  Kind of creepy, I know.  But strangely, even though there is no connection at all, there is a stone there for J. Dawson, as if they've buried the character from the Leonardo DiCaprio movie.  They didn't.  It's an extremely different person, named Joseph, not Jack.  And Joseph actually existed, not just fictionally.

lighthouse at Peggy's Cove

We went to the Citadel, a historic fort in Halifax, and then headed to Peggy's Cove to see the lighthouse.  We had heard that they may be shutting the tourist portion down because of lack of funding.  That's unfortunate.  It's quite a sight.  

From there, we headed to PEI, travelling to the island by ferry.  It was a great day to be on the water.  Charlottetown was first on the agenda - Province House, the place of Canada's Confederation and where PEI's legislature sits to be specific.    We also wandered a little in Charlottetown before we headed to Summerside.    They have an adorable boardwalk there.  Our hotel was across from the College of Piping and Celtic Performing Arts, so despite my dad's aversion to the pipes, we went there in the morning.  It was quick, lucky for my dad.  

Confederation Bridge from a distance

We drove a little bit further in PEI before heading back to the mainland, this time coming across the Confederation Bridge.

boardwalk in New Brunswick

We spent several days in New Brunswick with relatives before we headed home.  It was a nice trip; hectic, but relaxing at the same time.  It was nice to be away, but I think we were all happy to get home as well.

Back to Blog part 1 - nostalgia

I've missed a while.  It's funny, when I actually have stuff to write about, I don't write.  But when I have nothing going on is when I make time for it.  I'm on vacation this week, so I'm going to make time to update the things I should have posted months ago.

Carlos Delgado - the smile is amazing.

Anyway, July 21 was Carlos Delgado Day.  Let me explain - the Toronto Blue Jays inducted Carlos Delgado into the Level of Excellence at the Rogers Centre (I still think of it as SkyDome.  Probably always will.)  And since Carlos was a big part of my baseball history - and a special love of a friend of mine's mum - we took our mom's  to the game.  

Despite an eventual loss (nearly heartbreaking!  I have to say because they almost came back in the bottom of the 9th) it was a great time.  We saw Carlos up close, my friend's mum shook his hand, and Alex Gonzalez and Shawn Green were also in attendance, a special treat for my friend and I since they were our favourite players.  

Alex Gonzalez, Shawn Green & Jose Cruz Jr.

It was nice to see that the friendship we had seen so many years ago was true and still carried on beyond the team, and the game.  My friend and I agreed that while it was nice to see them, it did make us miss those days.  In a sad way.  And for a number of reasons beyond the obvious.

Say what you wanna say, and let the words fall out. Honestly...

New Boys!!

purging

I've begun to purge things that I no longer feel like keeping.  The problem in this, is that I also feel the need to look at it all, and then I get nostalgic and then I don't want to get rid of it anymore.  I have to make myself realize that having a memory to go along with some piece of something doesn't mean that I have to forever keep that particular piece of something.

But most of what I keep isn't of any particular use or value to anyone but me, so I kind of feel like getting rid of it devalues it.  And it's not got a whole lot of value to start with.  So then I feel pity for the poor item of whatever it is, and it goes back into it's box, or bag or wherever it came from and goes back under the bed (or on the shelf, or whatever.)

Purging feels good though, once I convince myself that's it's time.   So far, a huge stack of magazines have gone.  Ones that once were adorable, or cute, but are now just trite and useless.  And so, they sit in a garbage bag in the hallway.  Too heavy for me to lift in their current form, so I'll have to rebag them.

I hit the boxes of baseball paraphernalia most recently though, and I'm having trouble.  I don't want to get rid of any of it. I haven't seen any of it in so long, and a lot of it was stored out of the fear that I would never seen the old logo again.  But it's mostly back.  I really need to go through the box more objectively and realize that I just need to keep things that are particularly useful.  Or important to me.  Autographed things, or game used balls, or bats.  Maybe by morning, I'll have gotten that through my head.   That's my next step.

The goal is to make space for storage that I desperately need.  And I will do it.  I have plans, and I feel the urge to purge.  And it rhymes, so it has to work, right?

say what you need to say...

As of this moment, I have been in the same position for slightly more than 9 years.  In that time, I have seen 3 full-time Program Coordinators (my "companion" position in the office) and 18 co-op students (mostly University, one College and a couple of high school) rotate in, and back out, of the office.

This could indicate several things: 1) that I'm loyal and not given to floating in and out of things, 2) that I'm in a rut that I can't get out of.  Mostly, it means that every 4 months I have to retrain the only other person in my office.  And by the time most of them are actually useful as support in the position, they leave.  And the process starts all over again.  The few who have stuck around, stay long enough for me to get into a comfortable synchronicity with them before they go and leave me to the pattern again.

I'm tired.  And I dread going to work.  And I think what I said above is the main reason for both things.  I'm in a constant state of uncomfortableness with the newest additions and they're never around long enough to get out of it.  I've got no one I can rely on, to know that if I'm off one day, they'll pick up the slack.  I have no peer.  It's lonely.  And frustrating, because I'm also mostly surrounded by people who only kind of get it.  It's not that I physically have too much to do, though I can't say that I don't hate having to do parts of the Program Coordinator job as well as my own, but it's mentalling taxing having to adjust to and remember what these new people do and don't know all the time.  Trying not to expect too much at the beginning, or expect too little later on.  I don't know how to keep straight where they are at any given moment in time.

And I want them to ask questions when they don't know something, but I often feel as if I'm always answering the same questions.  It's not usually their fault; I just can't remember who has asked what, or when.

Like I said, I'm tired.   Part of me is proud that I've managed to weather all the crap that's been ongoing in the job for the past 9 years.  Another part of me is screaming "Why won't someone just help me get out?!"  But it's all mental, right?  Take a few deep breaths.  Remember that it's not the co-ops fault that they're here and they're learning, and try not to snap their heads off.  Eventually I will get my due.

Or maybe this is it.